today, I realized that you should not depend your happiness on someone or something, your true happiness must come from you. It's all my fault I expect then yeah it didn't work out maybe that's the thing about waiting it's like gambling whether you're gonna win or lose your heart out. i must admit it's really tough for me to think that all of my wishful thinking of Dubai isn't gonna happen anymore, life's getting tougher when you get out of the teenage line. I'm 20 and still in college, I need to know what I really want to do in life and what really matters. It's just that It's really hard to take when you get frustrated, I expected that much. I need to stop pretending face the reality and put my feet on the ground, I thought life is easy as that, I should remind myself with my limitations. I should stop being grumpy about it, well that's it we're not gonna be able to catch the flight. 2016 has made me realize two things, if you really want something you should work for it. Second, waiting isn't fucking easy but the thing is, the only way you can't be hurt is DO NOT EXPECT.
that's the bottom line of this shitty post. DO NOT EXPECT
also don't rely your happiness or worth on other. Know your worth bitch.
letter to my future self: HEY, is that what you really want in life? there's a lot of opportunities out there, stop being lazy.