... I HATE that "androphilia" was taken up by assholes, because it could be a very useful term for my sexuality.
That is - I am attracted to masculine energy. Since I'm attracted to women with a lot of masculine energy as well as men--and since I am neither man nor woman, "gay" and "straight" and even "bi" (tri?) are meaningless. Pansexual works, but I feel like its misleading to femmes.
Dita von Teese is a lovely woman whose charms I appreciate, but she has never turned me on like Joan Jett or Rachel Maddow. Laverne Cox is stunning, but does nothing for me. And while I'd very much love to have drinks with Alan Cumming or go cruising with Adam Lambert, we could never be more than friends. Though I'd totally do David Bowie, so it's complicated.
Truthfully, when I think to myself about my sexuality, I always think gay. Or "fag"... but I feel like, as a non-male, it would be inappropriate to adopt that as an identity.
I am quite certain about my identity and sexuality--it's just the language to talk about it that's lacking.