I've Become Too Powerful
So I got my wisdom teeth removed this morning. All four of those pieces of shit were cancelled immediately and now they're gone from my mouth. On one hand I'm glad because like one had already started to grow in and break through my gums which was annoying but on the other hand I am currently suffering. Honestly, the best part of the whole experience was supposed to be post surgery when the anesthetic was still coursing through my body but............................. ya boy was awake the entire time for the surgery lmao. I think I remember feeling some pain when they cut me once but I mostly felt pain from the fucking IV the stabbed in my arm. I don't think and IV drip is supposed to hurt you like that but it did. Anyway, I was pretty conscious of the high I was having when they gave me the anesthetic because there was a couple times where I would catch myself going on a really weird train of thought and then I'd be like lmao shut the fuck up you high ass which is chill if I was just gonna be taking a hit from a bong but paying for some anesthesia?????????? I expected to get sent to a different world. I wanted to be knocked out and then within my state of unconsciousness I wanted to be in outer space, possibly existing as dark matter and ruining everything classical physics thought was real. Clearly not though as the whole time I was just thinking to myself that they were cleaning my teeth before surgery for hygiene purposes and that the real anesthesia was coming soon. So then they're done removing the teeth in what felt like was 10 minutes and I'm sitting there like okay good bye world now is the time but my dentist comes back and she's like okay you're all done. Honestly I should've demanded at that point that they pump me with more drugs and send me home like that as opposed to my state of semi-highness. I'm just so disappointed. I've been in my bed for like nine hours just reflecting on this entire experience and how incredibly let down I am. Beatrice told me last week that like smoking a lot can make you resistant to anesthesia but I didn't think I'd become so powerful in one semester. Listen, I can still get baked with just a pipe so I mean I'm clearly not that strong. Anyway, basically the summary of today is that I am suffering because I can't eat the food I want to eat and I'm ready to move on with my life.
Anyway, this next paragraph developed from an incident where I was actually high so we can all relax there. It was our last night before this past semester ended so obviously Amar and I got baked lmao and so we wanted to order pizza using Amitav's leftover plus dollars. Like what better way to be festive than to gorge ourselves you know? So we get Amitav's ID number for it and Amar starts calling the Domino's place and when he says the address the guy is like oh, we don't deliver there. So we hang up and are a little confused but it turns out Amar had called the first Domino's number he got when he just googled Domino's lmao so it somehow gave us a place in a different state but anyway, we were ready for real this time so we try calling again and he called one that was two hours away lmao like yeah he got the state right but that's still so far off. We eventually get it on our like fourth try but after we hung up on the second Domino's I say it's really embarrassing that this person on the phone has such a horrible perception of us now. Like, obviously there's no face to this person in their head but it's still a version of us that exists somewhere in the world. And that's how I reasoned out that the multiverse theory already exists because every interaction you have with someone creates a version of yourself that's different than any other version someone else has. Inherently to the three Domino's employees we stupidly called that night, we're just huge stoners who can't read. That's one version of Amar and Todd that exists in the world now. They've even supplemented these perceptions of us with things they assume we do thus flushing out another version of ourselves even further. The people you are close with even have different versions of yourself in their head. There's just no one singular version of yourself in the world isn't that crazy!!! Some of these perceptions obviously have similar traits but the Todd in Amar's head and the Todd in Amitav's head are different regardless of the number of similarities. Anyway comment below if you are impressed that I figured out the multiverse theory after we fucked up calling pizza and if you're not please keep it to yourself thanks.
This past summer I started speaking in Vietnamese to my mother in an attempt to become slightly more fluent in it. As it stood, I was pretty limited in my actual speaking abilities but I could understand and respond in English with ease. So anyway, it was more of a matter of developing the accent and getting comfortable using the language as I already had an ear for it. This wouldn't be a problem had I just dutifully went to Vietnamese school as a child but instead my streak of rebelliousness came early and I deliberately failed out so that I wouldn't have to go anymore. Pretty bold move by seven year old me to be honest. This was way before I was programmed to reject failure at all costs so we can really see how I would have been had there never been pressure to always be the best. Anyways, fast forward to now and I'm much quicker with my Vietnamese than I was during the summer and I'll even use it with my dad too so growth!!! I originally only spoke with my mother because one, it was really broken and at best would be a few words at a time and two, my accent was really bad but my mom wouldn't laugh at it and would course correct if necessary. So obviously a very safe choice for me to begin developing my skills. This whole ordeal could be avoided obviously had my dumb ass when I was seven had even the tiniest bit of foresight and realized that being bilingual would be beneficial and honestly pretty cool by the time I was 18. The naivete of youth has once again failed me. I say once again as if I'm jaded by my past but to be honest not really. I just do wish I would have learned earlier instead of being forced into this process of learning based on my limited audio knowledge. The good news is the progress though obviously. Maybe I should put becoming fluent in Viet as one of my decade goals? That would be a good one but would require a lot of personal growth so............... I'm not sure my decade goals were supposed to be that real. I'll just have to let the thought simmer for a little. I do, after all, have an entire decade to decide what my decade goals will be before I have to set a whole new round of decade goals. The comfort of time in it all its fakeness at its best.
Wishing I was more drugged up for this post but alas I was barely at all today so this is the best we're working with I guess. Perhaps in my bed rest I'll think of other interesting things to write about but until then I'll just be counting the minutes until I can eat real food again. As always, stay tuned for the drama of it all.