So................................. it's been a while. It's been a very long while. I actually don't even know how long it's been. I haven't checked my blog in a while honestly. We're strangers now. I don't know if I have an explanation for why I've been gone. I guess writer's block? Maybe in a sense. I've kinda been lost in my thoughts for a bit but I never really felt like writing? Not all these thoughts are suitable for the blog of course but it's kinda nice to be able to write things down sometimes even if it's not like the braziest things I'm thinking. I dunno. Just feeling off I guess. But I did have a post in the drafts for a while it just never got finished. A lot of idks I just don't know things right now. You know those things that are like: perfectionists often procrastinate because they're too scared of not doing it right that they just don't do it. At one point in my younger life I think I would've really fucked with that and been like yeah yeah!!! yeah!!! That's it finally someone explained my tragedy. But I dunno if I identify with that as much anymore. I just don't know if I'm actually a perfectionist. Partly I think I'm just a lazy person. I mean, aren't we all?????? The curse of the millennial: lazy, self-absorbed, detached you know? So in part I think I just didn't write for like an entire month out of laziness. I think the other part being busyness but not busy as in like school work I think I just started taking on a lot of other hobbies? No, I think I start developing more personal relationships with new people. Specifically the volleyball group. I have seen a very recent spike in activity with the volleyball group outside of volleyball. I am pretty much deep into a new friend group and it's getting to the point where it goes beyond just spiking a ball at each other and me trying to hit on VB. I'm just legitimately friends with these people now!!! I went out with a few of them once. We danced at a bar until the lights came on, the lights come on at 2 am!!! We were out until 2 am that night. I think we've solved the mystery. It's very very time consuming to begin to make new closer friends especially when it happens in parallel to friends you already have. If you were trying to hang out with one person cause you thought they were chill it'd be like oh you should come over sometime and like maybe your other friends will be there too and it'll just be like that but there's like 6-11 of the volleyball kids. It's hard to do joint things like that. So anyway, I'm out here just trying to socialize and I don't have time to write and I'm sorry I tried to make friends and it came at the cost of this blog.
Anyway, in more interesting news: yesterday I had an interview with the Neighborhood Development Services for an internship this summer. I'm greatly conflicted between working this summer and studying abroad but my parents would prefer me to get a job and not ask them to spend more money than they already have and it's like that's very fair and I understand but I also know I wanna go to Amsterdam. I'd just feel like very bratty very spoiled kid if I just pushed for it until I got it but I also know like we have the means for me to go abroad. It's a tough situation regarding summer. Anyway, the interview. So the first part that's great about the NDS is that it's in City Hall. The night before I had just gotten high on a Tuesday and watched some Parks and Rec with Amar so obviously the simple fact that I was going to enter a City Hall analogous to Pawnee's City Hall was incredible. It was time for my mockumentary to start right there in City Hall at 2 pm. I don't think I'm super unreasonable to hope that working for a local city government that I too will get to experience some wild and perfectly comedic moments while also meeting my life long work friends who eventually just become my best friends and then further finding someone to marry because in my story I'm the one who gets to be Leslie Knope. I'm Leslie. I'm a capricorn!!!! Anyway, basically walking from the parking garage to City Hall had a lot of thoughts running through my had half of which thought that maybe I'd get hired solely based on how perfectly tied my tie was because I tied it perfectly yesterday and the other half thinking I was about to enter my very own version of Parks and Rec. So I don't wanna say I'm wildly disappointed at City Hall and the NDS for my very normal experience but there were literally no theatrics. No story to my interview, no film crews asking me to step out for a second to do a talking head nothing. Honestly if they offer me a job I might have to say no on the basis of lack of story line in NDS. I'm here to fulfill some weird TV fantasies not work and get """"""""""experience""""""""" okay. Other than this huge setback though I will say my interview went pretty well lmao. Next time I expect to see the film crews though and I'm not fuckin compromising on that.
In other news which I sneakily snuck into that last paragraph: marijuana is back on the menu!!!!!!!!! Amar finally got his damn drug almost two weeks ago and we've been high for like the majority of the days since last Thursday. I actually had a 10 page paper to write Thursday night so I stayed up all night with one cup of coffee coursing through me giving me the strength to write such a thing. Anyway, what's really important is that I'm currently going through a huge shock in terms of object-memory relations. So we enjoy gb's because they are efficient and we love them and I'm not gonna justify my entire life so we like them because we like them. In one tragic moment though I dropped the bad bag™ onto my fake tile kitchen floor and the cup we usually use for gb's cracked. First the electrolyte bottle was lost I don't even know where and now the cup we usually use was cracked. So I scrambled through my kitchen to find something else to hold all the water and lo and behold I came across all the plastic tubs my mom brings down for me usually filled with some Viet food that I freeze for a while until I'm too lazy to cook and then I resort to it but anyway we usually get this plastic tubs when we order pho for take out because that's how they ship the broth from restaurant to home you know it just makes sense. So these pho broth containers, repurposed by my mother to feed me more, has now become tangled with the wrong people i.e. stoners i.e. users of the devil's lettuce. Lmao though I just think about pho or some other Viet food every time we are about to smoke a gb though like it's so brazy to me that I'm developing a new object-memory relationship 20 years later about something I formerly just thought delivered food to me. Honestly I think it really makes our gb set up more cultured. It's like, exactly what I think an efficient Vietnamese gb set up should look like. When I go to Vietnam this summer I'm gonna set out to find some stoners who smoke gbs and I wanna see what they're using and I'm just really hoping they have the exact same set up lmao I need the affirmation. Regardless, I am loving life smoking Viet gb's these days it's like great to be high again lmao hopefully NDS doesn't fuckin drug test!!!!!
I feel like I had one other high story to talk about but honestly I just wanna take some time out of my day to say I love Trevor Noah. That's been like a defining quality about myself these days. I could weave it into an introduction of myself and it'd be completely accurate like: hi I'm Todd, I'm 20 years old, I study civil engineering, and I love Trevor Noah. Easy. Seamless. We're in love, that's what love feels like you know we just mesh like that. Recently I've seen him talk about getting high twice on the show and it's like.............................. let's blaze together though................................. we should like link up and smoke or something it'd be chill Trevor just hmu lmk. Anyway, the point is that I love Trevor Noah so much so that I even turned on my tv to watch an episode live once. I sat through commercials. There's no ad block on tv's!!!! Ah!!!!!!!!!! Trevor I love you!!!!!!!! I kinda thought the show, and I mean the Daily Show in general, was gonna just be a lot Trevor doing those bits of news the whole time but actually the majority of the show is him talking to some guest and I'm like Trevor I'm here for you stop inviting other people to your show thereby taking away from your talking time. Regardless of how long his cold open is though, I will love and support him. Really though Trevor you should like hmu sometime I'll be free I swear.
That was fun. I wrote this during class today because I've decided my contribution to my education today was simply getting to class. I'm glad to be back though ladies!!!! I'll try to not drop off like that ever again but you know how the artistic process goes. As always as always, stay tuned for the drama of it all.