I’m Gonna Buy A Sansevieria This Weekend
Do you think home depot has like a 4th of July sale on home and garden stuff? Basically on just their plants? I would really appreciate buying a snake plant on sale. The reason I have made this decision is because I was looking through someone’s vsco today and they had a bunch of cool portraits with a snake plant in it and obviously the snake plant has been on my list of plants to acquire since first year but now it’s come into the artistic fray and like I have to have it. So that’s like my long weekend plan. I actually have a long weekend thanks to the 4th being on Tuesday which isn’t surprising because I work in a local government but I feel like I was kinda blindsided by it I was like a little shocked? I dunno but I think I already knew my parents would get off work and they’re in federal government so I feel like that should’ve been my own indication right there? What I lack in logical deduction skills at work I make up for being the resident graphic designer. Jk I’m not even that. But anyway I think I have a lot of work stories today. They’re kind of people spotlights really. These are not people I know very well at all. If anything I know like 0.5% of who they are but so far they’re very interesting characters. There’s this one old white lady named Pam actually and Pam made a pretty shitty joke once so I actually don’t really like Pam. One time these two black women were making some jokes about slavery and working like a slave and then Pam chimed in at one point and just said “slave driver” and I was like……………………. taken aback. And all three of them laughed but I know Pam fucked up like whiteness can’t joke about slavery sorry!!!!!!
I’m kinda stopping that there but I don’t really wanna talk about Pam anymore because she’s just old and loud and it’s not interesting content. I’m here to bring you only the best curated content around. But I haven’t been really doing anything interesting lately which is the problem. This blog thrives off extrapolating small odd incidents into long paragraphs that comments on each second of the interaction piece by piece but without odd incidents there’s nothing to write about but I’m here at work with nothing to do for my last thirty minutes so I’m trying to force myself to write something. That’s how writers get through writer’s block right? I’m a writer, I get writer’s block cause like I said I’m a writer. I’m pretty sure most writers don’t go in circles to move on from any mental blocks. Speaking of writers, last night I was on the phone with Amar and I got Fitzgerald and Hemingway mixed up. I’m still unsure which one is which and who wrote what but I do know I read a book by one of them that Amar sent me a pdf of and it was not good. I don’t know how they became classics? I read the book The Sun Also Rises and I’m not gonna bother to google which one wrote it but I think it was Hemingway I’m actually like 95% sure it was that white man because I am going back through the process of reading it and I just feel like I mentally banned Hemingway from my future reading lists ever again after reading the book. It was so mundane but in such a bad way and his writing was really easy to read which isn’t necessarily a bad thing but like it was simplistic and also boring content like in summary: rich white Parisians fuck around and are passive aggressive. That’s about all that happens in the book, the most exciting parts are when he finally lets his characters loose and they just go on these paragraph long tantrums ripping apart one another and it’s like ah yes they finally do more than just drink and eat. Apparently the book is a joke about the main character whose name I can’t remember not being able to have sex or something cause he lost his dick in war and apparently it’s a testament as to why war is bad? Idk should I have prefaced with spoiler alert? Does anyone care anymore? It’s not a good book. Whichever of the two white men I just mentioned up there should not have gone through with writing it. Maybe this is a new segment of the blog: book reviews. The Sun Also Rises gets 1 (one) singular period (.) out of my usual 20 (twenty) period long ellipses………………………………. just one.
Anyway, recently I’ve also been bidding for a new camera on ebay. My cousin’s secondhand camera was a ton of fun and I was able to learn the basic trifecta of ISO, shutter speed, and aperture but now I want autofocus and a smaller camera body and an articulated screen for creative framing and I’m getting paid to blog these days so here we are. I bid on two cameras at the same time which is bad or ebay cautions you against it because if you win you’re obligated to buy it but I bid on the second camera after my first bid got outbid and I wanted to strike gold somewhere else where no one had bid yet so I think I’m okay. I’m just unsure how anyone wins anything on ebay. Do you just have to sacrifice part of your day to buy shit on ebay? Like if bidding ends at 10 am then you sure as hell can bet that the serious ebay buyers are blocking out the full hour prior from 9-10 to prep themselves for the final minute. And I think I know that’s what I have to do too to win but these bid times all end so inconveniently. Like tonight one bid ends at 7:03 or something. I’m gonna be playing volleyball and I highly doubt I’m gonna take the time out of my volleyball play time to sit refreshing the ebay page to win one bid. Granted, it’s a good price but to sacrifice the first time I’m playing volleyball in like two weeks for one bid? I don’t know. I don’t know if I can do it. I think I talked about ebay before too when I was looking for a 50 mm lens. It still eludes me. It’s been what, six months? Still can’t say I know what I’m doing when I open an ebay tab. Tsering apparently bought her fitbit off ebay by sniping, I think they call it sniping at least. Like you’re supposed to just swoop in and buy it in that last thirty seconds or something which is tough for everyone else trying to play the bid game over the course of the week. I think I also don’t want to watch the bid time countdown from like three days because it’s like, if I like the price now why can’t you just also give me the option to buy now? There are too few items in which I can just click buy now on some fixed price for their secondhand camera. Bidding is too big of a barrier in shopping for me. I can’t do auctions. I can’t do them, like what’s the point ladies? All this money is fake and I just want a fucking camera and capitalism has probably led you to selling secondhand items online for an extra buck to make ends meet or to just have some extra spending money so you can live comfortably but at the end of the day the free market is fake and so is this auction just let me pay a fixed price for this shit. I think the moral of my ebay experience is that capitalism is bad. It’s always a fair conclusion.
Anyway, it is nearing the end of day for me here at work. The intern next to me has zipped up his backpack which honestly only makes me want to pack up more but I’m trying to last at least five more minutes before I start the process. This was actually fun to write once I got past that first paragraph. The first one was bad. I didn’t have fun writing it and it wasn’t funny it was just bad and Pam is actually uncomfortable. She definitely makes me nervous. BUT ANYWAY, no more writing about Pam every basically. Hopefully someone blesses me with some ebay skills so that I can finally win a new camera because I am somehow more deserving than anyone else trying to buy. Until next time, stay tuned for the drama of it all.