"The great Way has no gate, yet there are a thousand different roads that lead to it. If you pass through this barrier just once, you will walk free in the universe."
-Mumon, The Gateless Gate, China 1228 C.E.
Trying to change the things in our life to suit our needs is worthwhile only as long as we realize that we will never, ever succeed.
First, because nothing is ever as it seems, which is why, at best, there is always a nagging sense that we can never get closer than an approximation of what's really going on. And second because everything changes, which means that we can't rely on anything lasting or remaining consistent for very long, including ourselves.
Who I am now and who I was ten minutes ago are completely different people. We habitually create a false sense of consistency by piecing memories of the moments of our lives together into a narrative we call our "self", but that's an illusion. Sort of like frames of a movie that appear to make a fluid story until you slow the projector down and realize each image is unique and not dependent on the next.
Living an authentic life is letting go of having anything to hold on to, resting in not-knowing, and accepting confusion as the necessary companion to wisdom. From this position we experience things as they are, but not in a way we can make sense of.
This is challenging because uncertainty is so difficult. Our minds can't deal with it. We freak out.
Looking around and actually seeing the world as it is (empty and formless) and ourselves as we are (open and vulnerable), is terrifying. We immediately jump to explanations and reasons (like this one) as ways to calm ourselves down.
So we adopt a new, better story about ourselves and the world, but there is always that nagging feeling that something is off, like looking through a camera with a cracked lens (or in a mirror with cracked glass).