So I was thinking this weekend, it's about a year since K and B got married. At the wedding reception, H dragged me out onto the dance floor, hammered, and danced with me in a way that I was rather uncomfortable with, she being married to a good friend of mine and all. I got to know her a lot better, and I wasn't comfortable with that at all (not that anything improper happened, but still).
That had the unfortunate effect of waking up the system, as it were. I've been single for a long, long time, and things sorta settle down and become dormant after a while. Which is good. It's ideal, actually, in that you don't drive yourself mad. Desire drifts away for the most part (with occasional flare-ups), and you can get on with your day.
The day-to-day is fine, it's just when you look back and see the sum total of passed days when things get a bit startling.
But yeah. Having that amount of contact, the body remembered just what the big deal was with that whole sex thing, and it wanted more.
So I went on OKCupid, which was awful. It's the go-to site for a lot of people, but it wasn't much good for Hamilton, I found. Firstly, everyone was in Toronto, and good luck reconciling that. Second, the ones in Hamilton were a bit of a freak show. The pickings were slim -- either complete messes, or way, way out on the alternative fringe, which isn't what I was after (nothing wrong with that, but it just wasn't my bag).
Then I tried Match, and the pickings were much better, but the site was lousy. I went on a couple of dates, but nothing clicked. Fine.
I might try online dating again, and it might go better now that I know how the system works. Getting thrown into the deep end with those things is awful, and a waste -- your period of maximum exposure is the same period as minimum knowledge of the interface. If that makes sense. Probably not.
But really, I just want everything to go fallow again. Being single is fine, for the most part, but if I could get this one part to finally die down, that'd be a lot easier. If nothing's going to happen anyway, then I would much rather not obsess over it. A year later, and I still can't get my body to calm the fuck down and shut up.
Stupid body and its stupid needs.