So this morning I got an email from that OKC woman in Toronto, asking me to email her at such and such an address, as she was exiting the system.
I thought she had already called things off, as I asked her point-blank if the Hamilton thing was a dealbreaker, and she said that it "put a spanner in the works". Not a direct answer, but not an endorsement, either.
I haven't responded. I will. But how to respond?
On the one hand, I should keep searching out possibilities, wherever they are, especially given all my moaning about this stupid thing.
On the other hand, I'm dreading having to go to Toronto for a relationship. For her, for anyone, really. God, I'm busy enough as it is just trying to keep up with my own life, but to add time to/from/in Toronto to that? When the fuck is that supposed to happen?
I'm also dreading emailing her using my RL email address.
Of course, I could be a huge asshole and not email her at all.
If there's any benefit to having done this last round of e-dating, it's been to convince me that I really can't be bothered with any of it. I am quickly retreating to my usual, anti-social, hermetic self. And that's quite appealing.