Well, I wanted a sign, and I got one. Dutch Girl couldn't have been clearer that she isn't interested. I wanted clarity, and boy, did I get it. Yay?
I think my preoccupation with all this has to do with the season, both for the holidays and my birthday, all these markers that another year has passed, and nothing has changed. The day-to-day is never that bad, it's when you look at all those days in sum total, and these dates on the calendar force you to do that. Still, it's not as bad as finding a stash of condoms that have are well past their expiry date. You can't lie to yourself then. And so I've learned not to look. Ungh.
Whatever. I'm just letting off steam. I just need to find a new placeholder crush, that's all. Tomorrow I'll be in Buffalo, and a visit to the young ladies on Elmwood should be just the thing.