I have to say, this suicide business has been weighing on me quite heavily these last few days, trying to find out information about Cort, and on suicide in general. I know nothing about it, only talk. (And work filters blocking out suicide prevention sites on the basis of "extreme violence"? Come on.)
It's at the point now where I'm actually looking forward to going to the reception on Friday, as that will give me a moment of closure for myself. I expect that I'll stop obsessing over it then, that I will allow myself to move on. Well, 'looking forward' isn't the right phrase, of course -- but finally offering my condolences to Hay, and shirking the dread that comes before that, that'll be a huge weight lifted.
Partners for their whole lives. For the one to go on without the other, and carry that shadow around -- I can't imagine.
And yes, I hardly knew them, really. But even in my limited contact, they obviously had something rare and pretty special, and I'm thankful to have seen that even in my own little bit.