Whose fault is it but mine
I allow myself to feel pain time after time
giving permission for unreserved feelings to build over night
just to feel them plummet once you're out of sight.
Drinking up my already low self esteem to quench this thirst
knowing I will never put bettering myself first.
Is to be loved so much to ask
Its beginning to feel like searching for sobriety at the bottom of a never ending flask.