The last thirty minutes of my life says more about me than I care to admit. Often people ask me to tell them about myself and I find that to be a complexing statement. Whenever I am asked, I fail to conjure up any sort of redeeming thing to say and once came back with, 'I really like jeans.' Fortunately I said that to a boy who didn't truly care about much other than my vagina so he ignored it and we moved on. Next time someone asks, I'll consider telling them this story:
I came home from work rather hungry as teaching twelve year olds is more intensive than I could have ever imagined. I looked into the cupboard at my boyfriend's house at the shambles of food I had gathered from my mothers. Teachers get paid at the end of the month, which means I am rollin' in the dough of about five dollars. I saw pasta, and beef fried rice. I recalled that I had ground turkey in the freezer and thought I could make things work.
Everything I make tastes like shit. Seriously, unless its a PB&J or grilled cheese. I wasn't working with great materials however. The beef fried rice box was Hamburger Helper. I know that even as a child I never really enjoyed anything that came out of one of those boxes, but I continue to eat from them on principle. When I was a kid my brand new step-father said, "No more of this 'poor' food from now on" to my mother and I was offended. Of course he couldn't make anything, but he had no problem suggesting my Ma make something better.
I was annoyed that our 'poor' had offended him. He wasn't exactly well off and he has been the sole reason that my Ma has never left the status of 'poor' ever since. With his minimum wage jobs, we ended up actually getting that box of beef fried rice from the food bank. For a time it was the only place we could get food, and I'll tell you right now, 80% of what you get is expired. I also didn't look at the date on the box and still won't go look.
The ground turkey was frozen and probably had been for about 6-12 months. I bought it on one of my health kicks before I got real with myself and went back to pizza. I googled around and it said it would only taste best within four months, but it was my only resource so I said 'fuck it' to caution and taste right out of the gate. I decided to microwave it a bit being impatient and then head to the stove top.
About 25 minutes later I had done what I needed and mixed everything together. I took a few bites and hated it. It tasted like the one dollar cans of beef & vegetable soup at Wal-mart. Seriously it was awful and lifeless. Forcing myself to not waste food, I ate a few bites more before I threw it all out. Every last bit.
In the next five minutes I produced heavy sweats and felt like fainting and then immediately threw up. This is the main reason I refuse to go look at either of the sale dates because part of me just knows better. There's a reason they created Domino's and that reason is me.