SELFIE MONDAY 3/9/15 (see @poetryinmotion for details)
Note to self: Probably not wise to read other offerings before making my own...especially when the topic is 'fun', humorous. It's not funny
Still, i'm going with the first story that came to me when i read the 'assignment'. It's fun as in smile generating and funny only for the 'surprise' element, not funny like 'Silver Penis'. The photo is of me at Crater Music Festival (actually IN Diamond Head Crater) not long after arriving in Honolulu in 1971 and i looked pretty much like that in the story even tho it takes place a couple of years later...right down to wearing the hat.
By that time i'd decided it was a waste of scenery to work inside when living in Hawaii, so i was working for a bicycle rental company in Waikiki, the beach was west of our location, Hotels and tourist traps to the north, the zoo and Kapiolani park to the south of us. When not helping customers or maintaining the bikes i could look out at the Pacific, watch surfers. i enlisted an elderly Japanese man who walked down to the beach daily from our nearby residential neighborhood (then it was a family neighborhood with a few small communal households like the one where i lived) to teach me a few words of Japanese as there was a huge influx of Japanese tourists in '73-'74. Greetings, prices, 'wait' and 'thank you'--many spoke some English, but seemed to appreciate my efforts.
Every weekday at slightly varying times an armored car came down Kapahulu Ave and turned right onto Kalakaua Ave, the main drag in Waikiki. After a while the guys in the car started smiling and waving at me daily. Of course i smiled and waved back. Then one day the vehicle pulls to the curb and the back doors fly noisily open. For a split second, having lived in big cities many years i'm wondering if i can make it to the cover of the defunct gas station at back of the property...because i'm expecting to see guys in masks with guns jumping out carrying bags of money, and i don't want to be in their way.
But instead...here comes a uniformed guard holding an ice cream bar and telling me they feel for me standing out in the sun. He hands me the ice cream, i say Mahalo nui loa! (thank you very much), he hops back in the armored car and off they go. As i turn to wave at them as rounding the corner i realize i wasn't the only one with dire expectations...there's about a half-dozen tourists standing on the Kalkaua sidewalk with their jaws agape..still processing what they just saw. Just another day in paradise.