I wanted to get some other people’s eyes on this conversation. Or my memory of it, anyway. We all know just how reliable THAT can be. So, I was talking to the person and I mention (I forget why) that I’d been going through an emotional process centered around my history of emotional abuse. I don’t mention that this whole concept is fairly new to me, as a social worker dom of mine used the word to describe a very major relationship in my life in July (I think I have mentioned that to this person in the past) or that a decent-sized chunk of the Radical Fairy gathering I just attended was about that. Their response? “I like to think about my responsibilities, whereas you’re all about ‘Oh, they did this bad thing to me.’” Now, taking responsibility for my actions is rather foundational to my thought, even if I do get away from it at times. It’s certainly a trigger to be told that I’m not. So, I elaborate: “No, the problem was I’ve been caught since I got back from gathering in a fear reaction about possibly engaging with another emotional abuser.” [Relationship kept vague for reasons -- it is NOT a sexual, romantic, or BDSM relationship] I wasn’t watching my words as carefully (hypervigilantly) as I often do in heated situations, so I may not have stressed the “possibly” enough or been crystalclear that I was trying to figure it out. They then complain about me putting them into boxes of various sorts. What do y’all think of this interaction?