I loved him. I loved him so much. But I wasn't good enough for him. Then you came and made me feel special, beautiful, perfect, and finally happy. I knew you were in love with her but it didn't stop me. I wanted to feel alive. Maybe a little love. My mom was sick and I was definitely desperate. But you still stayed with me and I thought you were the best thing that's ever happened to me. You left me so many times. But I'm not mad at you. You loved her, and I loved him. I would do anything for him even if it means leaving you. Sometimes I still want to call you and hear your giggles. I miss our weird conversations. I miss our late talks. (the wet ones too) Life goes on and you can't stop anyone. But let me tell you something. I loved you. I've enjoyed every minute we've spent together. Goodbye is not permanent but letting go is. We can meet years later as old friends. We can smile and laugh about all the nonsense that we both went through. However, letting go is being okay with never seeing you ever again. Being okay with never knowing how your life turned out. Being okay with fifty or more years of silence. This is the part of life that doesn’t sit well with me and never will. It tears my heart in pieces. It goes against kindness. So... Goodbye.