Well, look at this. There is hope for us indies after all.
I don't know if you knew about this, but I didn't. I suppose you can buy anything. It turns out you can now buy a Kirkus review as an indie and get out there on the same platform with traditionally pubbed writers. It only costs $425 (7-9 weeks delivery) or $575 if you're in a hurry (4-6 weeks delivery). There is even a Kirkus' Indie Customer Agreement you have to sign. And here I thought it was reserved for geniuses only. There is hope for us mortals after all! Hey, everyone has to make money, right?