So I woke up, and the opening sentence of TUBE that was giving me nightmares finally came to me. The problem was, I was trying too hard. I just needed to step back and observe, like it had nothing to do with me, which is what writing is. For me it's still personal, but I'm learning. Here it is.
"Olesya watched the pale, cylindrical shape thrust at her from the semidarkness."
I'm not sure if I want to keep "thrust," maybe it will be "jab," maybe "lunge," but the "pale" will stay, and the "cylindrical shape" is what it really is, TUBE, and in Olesya's mind two merge into one, the organ and the toy machine. Not sure about "semidarkness" either. But it's about 8 PM and somewhat dark. In any case...
Today I'm cleaning up the character arcs, tomorrow surgery, and then on Friday I will start writing. The book that will have two themes running along, one uncovering the other. I hope I can do it. I hope.
Illustration by Agata Wierzbicka