Without writing I would probably not survive. No matter what happens, once I start, I disappear into another world entirely, and once I'm done for the day, all is well. Any pain, any worry I can write out. At times I feel guilty about having found this ability to withstand anything life might throw at me. I want to get back to the old comforting suffering that feels familiar. It's hard to kill our old habits, even if they hurt us, isn't it?