Sometimes I want to believe in dreams...
I saw my sister in a dream this night. I haven’t seen her for 6 years, and she cut off all contact with me after I publicly stated that our father sexually abused me. She lives with her husband in Vienna. I dreamed we were in a restaurant celebrating something, and then I saw her at another table and I walked up to it, and there sat my step-mom and my sister and her husband, and they were shocked to see me.
“I miss you,” I said. “I miss you so much. Do you want to talk to me?”
And she averted her eyes, and then she nodded.
Then, of course, I had to run the bathroom, and when I came out, they were gone. I don’t even know her phone number to call her, and my step-mom won’t give it to me. I hope one day I get to see her again.
I love you, Polina. I hope you’re happy.