Day 363 - Gifter and Gifted
Three gifts of the sponsor:
Listening, not teaching
Teaching, not telling
Telling, not doing
The deft hand of my sponsor is not immediately evident when I call him. It's only later, after I've had time to think and work through his responses that I begin to understand the real message he has for me.
It's the timing that fascinates me. Any one of his advices could easily have been the wrong advice, delivered at the wrong time. But how does he know?
Two rationales come to mind:
He's been there and thus knows what I needed at the time, not what I asked for.
He's not doing it all by himself.
The first, yes, that's obvious in retrospect, but it also indicates that he's letting me learn - guiding, not giving. That's perfect for me. I don't 'get' well.
It would be easy to immediately jump to divine intervention for the second rationale. Too easy, I think, and too dramatic, and too simple. Nothing is simple where I'm involved. I have always ever been the snarl in uncomplicated reasoning.
I think that it's a dance of need and desire between us that creates the well-timed answer. I need, and ask. He desires, and responds.
I need, but know better than to just ask for a solution, instead I ask for clarity. He desires to help, but rather than giving me what I think I need, he gently points me towards my goal.
These gentle tugs and pushes are effective. They're necessary. They are what channels the spontaneity of need into the spiral of thrust and parry, step and counterstep, challenge and response. It is a gift we give each other and the reason why the sponsor is grateful for his role. It is the hand of the divine made plain to see when we're ready to see it.
The greatest Gift the Goddess gives, is that She does not give it all.