holy shit hello ello there is so much i want to tell you about!
I finished my first semester of undergrad in december. since i was small i have dreamed of studying people and culture. i wanted to test the waters with some anthropology classes to see if this desire was met by genuine interest and i have fallen in love with the discipline. I feel like I have found myself on a path I feel positively about being on. Never in my life have I felt so free, especially without the burden of being an emotional crutch for my mother and sister, who i love dearly, but who have bled me dry since i was able to help them.
i feel overwhelmingly optimistic. I have straight A's in a somewhat prestigious university and I have friends who love me and do work that I am passionate about.
feelings still fluctuate from time to time but i've realized that i have more control over these things than i thought, especially now that i don't have familial influence and i can truly focus on myself (selfish, yes, but selfishness has only benefitted me thus far)