My eyes hurt a lot right now. I've been rubbing them a lot. I feel very sleepy. My nose is also really runny. Tomorrow I have a biology lesson. I wonder what it will be like. The first lesson of the year...I mean. I interacted with Christopher today. I didn't have too much of a positive view of him because I always felt he was very condescending and mean. But I realized I wasn't looking at his good points either. He is actually a really nice caring person who constantly asked me if I was feeling okay or if I had enough water in my bag. He is quite the intellectual so I never thought he would bother with me. It's me after all. I don't know whether or not I have a positive or negative stand-in in Sota. I think it's very half-half. Maybe some people would think I'm that one girl who is laid back and stupid, or that one person with bad luck or is weird. Then again, the entirety of Sota is weird.
I don't know if it's a bad habit or not but sometimes I wonder what would happen if I am left to be all alone. To fend for myself. Would I survive?? Or would I succumb and lose my sanity. Like DST. Would I starve?? Would I find anyone to love me? Would I have my own children? What will my future be like? Isn't it scary just imagining. I look into a mirror and all I see reflected against it is failure and repeated mistakes. I tell myself I can do it. I can do it. I will never love again, and I never will be loved. If you repeat those words, you're selfish and stupid. I mean...I am loved by my parent's.
Chicken balls. I'm falling asleep typing this.