first (last, only) draft of this dumbass card game i wrote while being bored af at work, i present
THE FOUR ELEMENTS OF POWER
the rules are :
each player has the same deck, as follows
draw five cards to start
only one ace per turn
draw one card to begin your turn
play as many cards as you want, besides aces
blaguards and status effects stay in play
use status effects as many times as you want during your turn
spells get shuffled back into your deck when done
power moves get discarded when done
you gotta play unknowable cacophany to win
the deck :
ACE OF AIRHORNS, the AIR RAID SIREN - spell, opponent shuffles their hand into their deck, or you draw the number of cards in their hand. flavor text: "GET DUNKED ON"
EMPRESS OF AIRHORNS, the BWWWAAAAAAAAAA - status effect, players must shuffle a card in their hand or in play into their deck to draw a card, including during the draw step. no cards, draw seven.
Knave of Airhorns, the Bike Horn - status effect, shuffle a card from your playing field into your deck to blindly pick a card from your opponent's hand to shuffle into theirs.
Dipshit of Airhorns, the Noise Canceling Headphones - status effect, you can put a card from play back into your hand instead of shuffling a card into your deck, once per turn. flavor text: "these things are shit"
Blaguard of Airhorns, the Airhorn (x3) - blaguard, shuffle this card into your deck at any time to draw a card.
ACE OF GUNSHOTS, the TWENTY ONE GUN SALUTE - spell, opponent shuffles their playing field into their deck, or you draw all your GUNSHOT cards and then shuffle your deck. flavor text: "TAKE A SHOT AT THE CHAMP"
EMPRESS OF GUNSHOTS, the MACHINE GUN WILDFIRE - status effect, shuffle a card from your playing field into your deck to shuffle two cards from your opponent's playing field into their deck.
Knave of Gunshots, the Colt .45 - spell, you and your opponent draw six cards and take turns playing them, they don't technically count as "being in your hand" during this time. shuffle the unused cards back into your deck at the end. you go first.
Dipshit of Gunshots, the Shitty Mall Sword - status effect, at the beginning of your draw step, you must shuffle your deck from one to a thousand times, then draw an extra card. flavor text : "god, are you for real right now"
Blaguard of Gunshots, the Gunshot (x3) - blaguard, hide a card under this card. shuffle this card into your deckc at any time to reveal it. if this blaguard is removed, the card beneath it is played immediately following the removal.
ACE OF HAWKCRIES, the INTRO TO "WILDCAT" - status effect, all your spells are now status effects that take effect at the end of your turn in the order of your choosing. shuffle this card back into your deck at any time to shuffle all your spells-turned-effects back into your deck. flavor text: "OH SHIT SON IT'S ON NOW"
EMPRESS OF HAWKCRIES, the LION'S ROAR - spell, name either "spell" or "status effect." go down your deck until you find the first one of those and draw it. don't shuffle your deck afterward.
Knave of Hawkcries, the Pit Bull - status effect, interrupt your opponent with a spell once during their turn. your spell takes precedence over their card's play, but their card is neither in their hand or in play while your spell takes effect.
Dipshit of Hawkcries, the ASMR vid - status effect, once during the opponent's turn, you can cancel the effect of one of the cards they play. shuffle this card back into your deck when you do this. flavor text: "EMBARASSING."
Blaguard of Hawkcries, the Hawkcry (x3) - blaguard, shuffle this card into your deck at any time to return a status effect to your hand.
ACE OF CASHREGISTERS, the ICE CREAM MAN - status effect, every time you flip a coin, call it. if you're right, do the heads effect one more time than you normally would. flip a coin at any time, if it's heads, shuffle this card back into your deck. flavor text: "ONE HUNDRED PERCENT"
EMPRESS OF CASHREGISTERS, the MONEY COUNTER MACHINE - spell, flip a coin, if it's heads, draw a card, if it's tails, put this card on top of your deck.
Knave of Cashregisters, the Quietude of Paper Money being Made to Rain - status effect, if you must shuffle a card into your deck, flip a coin. if heads, draw a card after shuffling it into your deck. if tails, your opponent picks a card from your hand to shuffle into your deck.
Dipshit of Cashregisters, the Petulant Child - status effect, all your spells and status effect invocations are now the result of a "heads" coin flip. on tails, status effects do nothing and spells are returned to your hand. both are unplayable for the rest of the turn. flavor text: "i'm ashamed of everyone involved."
Blaguard of Cashregisters, the Cash Register (x3) - blaguard, shuffle this card into your deck at any time to "double or nothing" a failed coin flip
UNACCEPTABLE ADVERTISING, the POWER MOVE, WISH - search your deck for the card of your choice, your opponent does the same. flavor text: "check my soundcloud"
UNFORGIVABLE BEATSNATCHING, the POWER MOVE, STUN - gain the use of your opponent's hand for the rest of your turn. spells and power moves get shuffled back into their deck after use. status effects last until the end of their turn, then are shuffled back into their deck. flavor text: "suge knight dangled vanilla ice out of a window for the rights to ice, ice baby. anyway, robin thicke is trash"
UNATTAINABLE SERENITY, the POWER MOVE, BLIND - draw all your cards. your opponent draws seven cards, and can now shuffle cards from their hand and playing field to force you to shuffle matching cards back into your empty-ass deck. your turn immmediately ends. flavor text: "shut up and dance, dance before the police come"
UNKNOWABLE CACOPHANY, the POWER MOVE, KILL - if you have all four of your own aces in your field, you win. flavor text: "DAMN SON, WHERE'D YOU FIND THIS"