i want to marry you i do i said i do but i don't know if i could ever love you.
and that's not even the real problem here no the problem is that we're too young to plan a future like that and you won't even answer my texts.
the problem is that i'm finding myself making plans for our living room layout and googling names for our kids.
the problem is that i don't believe in love and you're the only one i want my family to fall in love with.
why won't you answer my texts can't you see i miss you i miss you so much it's tearing me up it's eating me i'm-
no i don't love you but i want to see your face at the end of the aisle i'll have a big christian wedding just for you.
but the problem all these fucking problems keep poking me in the ribs and mocking me when i don't laugh.
how could i laugh when you're the only thing that fills my lungs up just right like the laughing gas the dentists use to stop the nerves.
god i hope you're not upset with me i know i can't love you but i'll give you a full life and put lights in the cracks so only the sun shines through.
it's why i only text you when the sun goes down.
you don't even have to get me a ring just a simple brush of your lips against my temple and i'll promise to pray there every day.
i wish i could love you i do i said i do but all i can give you is my future and my morning breath and i know it's not enough but i will try anything for you.
i just can't love you.