issues that consume me #1
going places alone.
i cant stand to go places alone. well places where their may be social interaction. everyone tells me they don't understand this with me. when i am with a group pf people i'm the loud social outgoing one. introducing myself to others, including others in out adventures, coming up with the crazy plans to get us in trouble. but if there is chance their will be social interaction, i will not go alone.
sometimes i cant even go places where im going to know people. until recently a friend in the flow community, we don't hang out unless were spinning, has invited me to a lot of flow events. and i would get so excited about them but i wouldn't go. this is because those other people that i know bring friends that they are friends with outside of this community we are all involved in and small clicks would form and i wouldn't quite belong in any of them, and yes i would try to communicate with others, but id end up off spinning alone and not having any fun. now i'm working through it slowly finding place and i couldn't be happier with the little flow family i've created. but then these are only my friends at places where we can flow, therapy cafe, the hope arts center, or festivals. there not the call up and just do something with type of friends. though i would like them to be.
then there are some places that i can stand going alone. but i think its because it can result into things i can stand doing alone.
-well that's about it.
i do have 3 best friends. they live 3+ hours away. i miss them extremely.
so i guess this all started since i moved to the miami valley. all i do is work. and hang out with justin, my fiance whom i live with, and his friends.
i guess i need to quite being a whiny little bitch and put myself out there for once.
i need some friends of my own in this vast valley of ours.