I am just unable to focus today. I'm staring at my computer and getting nothing done. The last few days haven't been much better. It's darkness today. I hate my job, and this surprises me sometimes because for the longest time I believed you could find positive things about anything.
When I was in college I even wrote a speech about finding the positive in classes you didn't like. Algebra you know you are never going to use? You're expanding your mental capacity!
I learned to like waiting tables at a truck stop, by making challenges for myself. How fast can I get these orders out? What's just the right length of time to wait before refilling someone's coffee? It felt great to move fast when times were busy, smile at people and make them feel good. Everything wasn't rosy everyday, of course. There were the customers who complained no matter how hard you tried. The penny tips even when I put my all into my job. I liked it though, and it didn't take much to convince myself.
Then I went to college, and I got a career instead of job. I sit in a cubicle all day, mostly doing tasks a monkey could do for people who don't care. Theoretically, it could be a challenging job but my boss is a poor time manager who doesn't trust anyone else to do anything. Some days, I'm convinced she's stalling because she doesn't know how to do this job either.
I'm supposed to log each and every minute in a timesheet. How do I log staring at the walls for 30 minutes because I can't bring myself to do what I'm supposed to be doing?