Playground squeals turn to death chants playful tag turns to survival hunt and legs can’t seem to run fast enough to escape that word.
Willing eardrums to burst but remember even in life of silence message will still be heard loud and clear.
“She’s a lesbian! Get away it’s contagious!
Heard her mom’s one; runs in her blood.”
Remember when age innocent mom sat me down at kitchen counter said the way you love is something you’re born with. Said she’d love me no matter what.
How do I run from something that supposedly runs through me,
in my veins lies pain I don’t understand,
Her name...is Olivia.
Brilliant green eyes, curly red locks, freckles, buck toothed, strong minded.
Her smile makes me smile, like domino effect of happiness smiles are supposed to be contagious,
what I have is not contagious,
love is not contagious
Listen to heart long as it speaks conformity lest it convince you follow nature.
Everything deemed unnatural,
coincidentally everything not understood.
“Are you a lesbian?”
Corner of outside school campus next to worn black metal fence, surrounded.
By malicious smiles baring sharp teeth.
Like I’m floating in space.
Until hard metal digs deeper into back pressed against it.
At least in space you know what happens when you play with fire, when you play with lies,
get too close to sun, to truth, you’ll burn, like gazes etching targets on all available skin as they wait.....for my answer.
I can’t find one.
I shout no.
Mutual contentment with others company that developed somewhere between heavily accented lecteurs from indian freshman english teacher spent months on MLA format still can’t format my life and sweat dripping struggles as we suffer through required weight lifting class that never made me strong enough to lift societies expectations.
Wouldn’t have mattered if they did they learned better than anyone
not to hear evil
only speak evil and...
I hear, the shout, of fag.
It’s just, a bundle, of sticks.
Was taught sticks and stones break bones words won’t hurt me.
Yet I’m shattering, from words morphed into bullets, rained down by guns, lodged in mouths and triggers pulled by tongues all pointed at me, which seems worse?
Language is a powerful tool.
Thanks to lessons from teacher, from parent, from friend, from bully, learned I like fag.
freaking amazing g
What I want to be.
Was told it runs through blood, damn straight blood is thicker than water, same blood makes me my moms daughter, daughter of a fag,
Fag is sticks and stones building houses, homes of freely accepted genuine love.
Yes I’m fag, queer, lez, homo, everything in between
I’m fagtastic, fagalicious, fagulous.
So thank you, bully, hater, homophobic homosexual, who’s too scared to let the world see, for showing how great it is to be a f-a-g.