A month after heart surgery.
Home by myself on the weekend. How come wives don’t say,” Just lie around all day, play video games, do nothing, enjoy yourself. "I just hope that the wooden railing doesn’t fall off the stairs in the meantime, but just chill out, bye", and off she goes to work. So, railing repairs it is! I got out my almost new belt sander to whip the railing into shape. Rmmmm, roar, bzzzzzzz, boom. Belt flies to pieces in 15 seconds and makes a valiant attempt at grabbing my wrist and sanding me back to original. Hmmm, pathetic design, cheap crap. This is a constant theme in my life as I only buy cheap crap, theorizing that if it only lasts 1 year I can purchase cutting edge rubbish more quickly. I surveyed the questionable design and began implementing some obvious upgrades, I would have thought. Readjustment here, bigger bolt there, what were these guys thinking? Anyway, I wanted to get on with it so I fired it up and attacked the railing with gusto. Shame gusto wasn’t between me and the sander but he had long since run away. The belt flew to pieces in under 3 seconds this time, flew past my head and I dropped the sander down the stairs where it leapt about like a migrating salmon, and would have cut the electrical lead to pieces but fortunately the belt was no longer attached as it had tried to attach itself to my head. I had managed to sand 3 square inches of timber, destroy a sander and not kill myself. That equals a nice cup of tea and few hours playing Grand Turismo 5 in my book.
#Writing #sadlytrue #unhandyman #gustomissingflyer #marriedyourhonour