I once broke up with someone I really loved. He really loved me too. It was definitely the best relationship I've ever had. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life. I'd almost rather get divorced twice than do that again (not really.) But I'd do it all over again, because it was the right decision. As much as I loved him, I knew he wasn't the right long-term partner for me. So I broke up with him after four years. I wasn't ready to let go completely, but it wasn't fair to him to try the "just be friends" route. He needed to be completely free to find someone else without me on the periphery. No false hope. He disagreed. Indescribably awful to see someone you love hurting like that, know you're the cause, and know you have the power to fix it, but you won't because you know that person isn't right for you. It took him a few years to move on. And he only really did when he met his wife. (Who forbade all but very limited contact with me. I don't blame her at all, but she had nothing to worry about.) I had lunch with him a couple of years ago. He's happy and settled. Still married, three boys, and a beagle. And even though I was mid-divorce then, and I knew I still cared about him, I didn't regret my decision at all. I've had to keep reminding myself that I know how to let go when something isn't right for me. I just forgot for a while after spending so many years trying to hold on to a relationship because I'd committed so fully to it. (Helpful life tip: Do not marry someone you've only spent a few months actually living in the same city with just because they're moving and you don't want to move with them without a wedding ring. Wow. Such a bad idea for both of us. Hindsight.) I'm finally remembering how to let things be. Not just in romantic relationships, but in general. To see what happens. To not need anything in particular to happen. To finally acknowledge what my needs/wants are and to honor those, while still respecting the right of the others to be as they will. So peaceful.