Rain just started on the patio outside my window. I love that sound. I love being warm and cozy in my bed when it's cold and rainy out.
Sometimes I do wonder how my posts come across to other people. It's really hard not to hope people like them, and me. But at the same time, I really am doing this for me. It's fun being able to share my inner musings with the world. Sometimes I wonder if I overshare. My inner thoughts aren't what I present to the general public. I probably seem more serious here than I really am. In real life, I've had many people call me "sweet". Oh God, I hate that description. That sounds so uninteresting. So tepid.
To be fair, the people who've said that are all in the program. I do tend to treat them, especially the newcomers, with kid gloves. Oh good, now that I think about it, no one has ever accused me of being "sweet" (gag) at work. Though sometimes they underestimate me and think they can ride roughshod over me because I do have a friendly demeanor. I go for the Ms. Manners approach. You can firmly put people in their place without freaking out at them. It works for me.
My lighter side rarely shows up here. But I'm generally fairly upbeat and calm. (I've been known to get annoyed a time or two and express it.) I'm friendly and professional in business settings; and if you're a friend of mine, you'll see me laugh and joke a lot. I love laughing so hard tears come to my eyes. I tease my friends quite a bit (gently I hope), and they tease me a lot too. Of course we have serious conversations, but I rarely get into the thoughts I write here. I think this is why I enjoy these postings. It's also fun for me to share what I'm doing on an emotional/energetic level.
I know my thought experiments aren't the norm, but I find them fun. I would never do an exercise that said, "Today, I will make at least one adult cry. I want to see how that feels." In fact, my exercises don't really have anything to do with other people; but instead with my reactions to situations and interactions.
I've found that by changing my thinking around something, I can change my feelings and actions, and generally achieve a result I like better. Like finally getting my paperwork sorted so it's not at the back of my mind. Now I can focus on work. There's always something to do. And I've become much better about not procrastinating.
Though the last couple of days I haven't really been doing anything. Just finding it hard to shake off the meditations of the morning. Generally spacing out and listening to music. I have several hours of work to do tomorrow, so I'll have to get my head back in the game.
I got some work done the last couple of days, but not a lot. There wasn't much to do as a lot of people are out of town. One of my contacts just returned from Europe. I'm looking forward to talking to him. He's interested in talking about working on a real estate development project with me. (He raises equity, always a difficult proposition. Would be fabulous to have him on board.)
There are a ton of vacant properties in Oakland. The problem is land values are becoming ridiculous, so the only way to make projects pencil is to make the rents ludicrously high. I know people will pay them, but I'd like to provide an affordable product for the average working person. We'll see. He also has a stake in a company that does pre-fab for apartment buildings. I've been interested in that type of construction for the last 15 years or so. I could go on, but I tend to get carried away when I talk about it. I truly love development. It would be incredibly awesome to get back into it.
So many options! What a change from a year ago.